Pain is just one kind of sensation…

I enjoy pain sometimes, but I don’t consider myself a hard masochist.
I love sensation play. The more the better. Massages, head scratches, cuddles, being blindfolded while being tied up with rope, combining pain with pleasure… I love it. It’s apparently what gets me to subspace. Pain alone doesn’t seem to have the same effect, though on rare occasions I might get an endorphin high from it.
For me, pain is just another kind of sensation. It’s one of many that I enjoy. But I don’t like pain just for the sake of pain. I just like how different sensations make me feel. Sometimes I want to hurt and get lots of marks, or to have my tense muscles be beaten into a looser state. Other times I want the sensations to be soothing and pleasurable, especially if I’m blindfolded.
But more than anything, I like variety and the element of surprise. It makes me feel alive and excited. I like not knowing which sensation I’ll feel next. Being blindfolded and having my hearing slightly muffled by a large blindfold can help me tune out distractions and focus on what my body is feeling, and that seems to help me reach subspace.
And when a power dynamic is added into this mix… (*Melts into a little pile of happy goo*). Even if I’m not particularly in the mood for pain, if I’m submissive with someone I want to be bent to their will. (I’m not active with this right now but I do crave it. It’s an itch that needs scratching eventually.)
It’s interesting how masochism can be so different from person to person. Some people seem to just want pain, pain, and more pain while for others it’s just one little piece of the sensory pie. What does masochism look like for you?

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